sweet potatoes ...on crack

for thanksgiving this year i wanted to replace my usual pureed butternut squash. so i bounced around all the food blogs i usually creep on, and got my inspiration for these. basically... a monkey could make these. as long as that monkey has a sweet tooth.
what they are basically.... is a twice baked sweet potato topped with a pecan cookie batter.
hoe
lee
chit.

simple as all hell:


ingredients:
sweet potatoes: i did 6... (you do as many as you plan on eating,,, duh)
butter (1 1/2 sticks for six so you figure that out) room temperature.
brown sugar (a GOOD solid handful. small hands? do one and a half)
flour (i used a 1 cup)
cinnamon ( dump in as much as you want)
i shook in a liiiiiiiiitle ground ginger
i sprinkled in a smidge of ground cloves
i squeezed in a little maple syrup
i added a splash of vanilla
salt/ pepper (just because its sweet doesnt mean it needs this stuff... to taste)
mini marshmallows (a good handful)
toasted pecans (i used about a cup) all chopped the hell up.

how to make the best sweet potatoes you ever ever had:

- turn on your oven to *375
- poke your sweet potatoes after washing the dirt off them with a fork. dont wash them with the fork... wash them first, then poke them. just so were clear.
- plop your potatos on a foil covered sheet tray.
- on a different sheet tray toast your pecans if theyre not toasted yet. 7 minutes in the oven should be good. dont over do it, burt pecans really blow.
- in your mixer with the paddle, throw in the butter. overhand like CC Sabathia.
-add the spices , and the syrup, and the vanilla.
- turn on mixer.
- mix,, not too long.
- slowly add flour. i added enough flour to make this butter concoction look like cookie dough.
- throw in your marshmallows. i mixed them by hand, because, honestly, i felt bad for them. the mixer versus the marshmallows wasnt a fair fight.
- after an hour to an hour and a half, remove your potatoes.
let them cool a little bit.. 20 minutes? ok!
- cut a slice down the length of them...
- push them, forcing that slit open.
- pile a mound of the marshmallowey stuff on top .... *see above*
*** you can let them chill here if youre planning ahead... refrigerate them if you gotta*
- throw them back in the oven for about 20 minutes.
- take them out and go silly.

sparring is not really like riding a bike. unless you fall off and into a bunch of fists.

so heres whats up.

im back at my training 100% again, and when i say that, i mean, while i wasnt falling behind, i wasnt sparring once a week like i had been for the last 8 months.

fact: take 2 months off from sparring, get punched alot when you get back in there.

while i had been pretty satisfied with how my kicks have been coming along, zeroing in on details like never before...

generating more power through speed... lifting UP on my toes...etc.

and my hands, which, to be honest, technically speaking, have come a LONG way....

my hooks are tighter, punches more direct...

and my cardio....which is better than it's EVER been....

....youd think that youd have some sort of a clue as to how to keep it all together when you hop back in there and actually gear it up, and throw them things.

until you realize that timing is everything,

especially when dudes are throwing bombs at you.

last week i got in there with john, and for the first week back, i was happy...

happy i didnt get killed.

haha.

first round, i kinda ate some shots, and basically, tried to catch up with his timing.

let me tell you about john....

dudes a STRONG STRONG man to be testing waters with.

the worst way to catch up with timing after a sparring layoff is DEFINATELY not by seeing how well you can take shots from john gagnon, but i didnt really think that through, so thats just what i did.

johns really strong in the clinch, so knowing he enjoys him some clinch/pummel/knee work, i kept that in my mind as i tried to make it through that first round without getting TOO rattled.

hes also real good at jiu jitsu, so i basically took him down after some clinching, and tried to close out that round with me working myself to a better position, which i feel pretty happy that i did.

the last ime i rolled with him, he caught me in a damn arm bar, so i used the advice he gave me afterward, and used it, and hats off to him, it was effective.

during the 45 second rest between rounds, i basically made my mind up to let my hands fly...

the entire next round i felt REAL comfortable, i was working my jab well, my footwork was loose, and the fact that i changed up gears was really effective and kept him a little off balance.

moving forward, and letting the combos lose, i set him up for...

my superman punch.

and i landed it well.

*if youve ever sparred with me, you know you can expect that i will be throwing one superman punch, its a given. i may spend the entire round setting it up, or, i might throw it first, but,,, i will throw it. predictable? yes. fun as hell? yup*

i wobbled him up a little bit, and then, worked my way in , clinched some, then took him down again, where we grappled till the timer went off.

overall , i think that it was a good couple rounds, and since he had his BJJ class next, we called it quits there, which was fine, because i was pretty tapped.

my cardio was ok, but needs to be better, i need to relax more...

but,

its hard to relax when you have a bull in front of you.

a bald headed heavy ass handed jiu jitsu knowing mofo.

john is a true student of all the arts, and i can tell all hes going to do in there is make me better.

i hope to bring the same to him.

2 old dogs teaching each other new tricks is an ok thing.

a really ok thing.

now, my cousin (more like nephew) dustin has jumped ship over from the BJJ to the muay thai exclusively...

and this is awesome.

what else....?

steel sharpens steel.

im surrounded by steel in this dojo.

*newly crowned Black Belt Bill "call me Mister now mufugga" Trask, after trading leg kicks with me last year, this pic has NOTHING to do with anything, other than being purely awesome. i call that his Gorbachev leg... or his grape jelly leg... or... *


Lifes getting back to normal. Jaiden and Cooper are done (after this weekend) with soccer and fall ball. Rhys is no longer sick. *knock on wood* ... Rach is back at work, and falling asleep before the 2 year old. Sky is still the amazing kid he's always been,a daddys boy, so OBVIOUSLY hes smart as all hell... ahhhh yes... my personal raised ranch insane asylum is back and in effect !
and.. this page.. i havent forgotten about it. nope. imma start going nuts here. i'm gonna pimp it, and watch it blow up to at LEAST 20 followers! DONT HATE!
understanding how lucky i am to have a wifey who lets me out the house at least 2 nights a week to crush thai pads, i am committed to cooking at least one badass meal a week for her. and like in the past, im gonna take pictures of my culinary shenanigans, and share that shit with you. along with VERY amazing details of how to recreate such scrumptiousness ....
you deserve it.
for adding a profile here you should get SOMETHING , right?
and, sprinkled in between, you will get more frequent dojo reports, music and videos i love , pictures and crap of my kids ...
and me venting on the jackasses i work with here in HELL.
and anything else i feel like doing.
all the same crap, just more of it.

reason # 213 to keep your eyes on your shit up in here.......

my boy Tony here (row 3 seat 2) musta dropped his wallet.

and , its just silly that i found it, on the stairs walking up in here.

i was all tired from driving back from the Bronx after the Yankee game last night with my boy Jaiden.... but when my eyes landed on this badboy...i dunno, my day just kinda got sparkly... like a vampire in the sunlight...

*huh?*

he's in a tizzzzzzy.

now, i need to wait until someone who i feel like messing with (the choices are ENDLESS .. HAHA!) leaves ther desk for a little bit (a meeting, lunch,,,, whatever) and then imma zap this pic to their email, and then send tony an email from THEIR computer demanding ransom, or cookies or some shit. the confusion will be quite splendid to watch from my little nook here in hell.

this vent.... sucks balls.

holy shit, mayne. the AC in my office shit the bed. it was 70 degrees when i walked out to lunch. *not so bad* 77 degrees when i got back, *kinda bad* 1 hour later,, and now its like napalm up in this mufugga.

that vent sits up there and you can HEAR air blowing out of it....

*wipes forehead*

i sweat man!

sweaty neddy!

i feel like im workin for kathy lee gifford ,,,,,

kinda like i need to be sewing ROCAWEAR labels on over priced t shirts in a sweat shop in a straw hut in cambodia or some shit....

this aint right.

DOJO

they (jaiden and coop) wanted to name him BROWNIE... but, we already have a cat named friggin' MITTENS aka: mitzy .. and to be honest, homie dont play stupid pet namesno' mo'. ummm, until the next pet. where i will have no say. much like my last kid's name..... who am i kidding, im the bottom of the totem pole ...

*frowns*

BK aint fuckin around in Japan

BK Japan is celebrating their 3rd anniversary with this badboy.

3 patties, 6 onion rings, lettuce, tomato, raw onion, mayo, and "American" bbq sauce.

helllll yeah i'd eat this.

when i do dishes, it's like Jenga up in this bitch

first off i just DID these things, you think i'm putting them away?

*blink blink*

i DARE you to walk up to that sink all drowsy and sleepy n stuff, and try and cop a glass of water sleepwalking @ 2am,,

real quick now....

FIND THE NIPPLE!

and there is no 2nd off.

just sayin',

just copped a bunch of herb...

.... from whole foods. one big pot with basil, parsley, and rosemary. GORGEOUS stuff,,,, $19 . and, of course, a big ass pot of MINT, ($10)....mint..... for what?
*puts my hand up to my ear and squints, lissnin' harder*
riggggggggggght....
MOJITOS!
summer, my peeps , is officially on.

weird thing i do #1,782 ,,, writing shit on myself before a belt test

sooo, it's belt test day ,, again. for my first 3 or 4 belt tests, my gut would get all knotty, and i could't eat.. and my heartrate would be all silly n stuff leading in to it....

wait..

that hasn't changed.

I

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE me some belt tests!

this is my last belt test with the people i have taken all my belt tests with to this point, and lately ive been feeling really a little bitter-sweet about moving from Norwich to Colchester, mainly only because of the bonds made there over the last almost 2 years... but then, i realize who i am, and i say fuck it let's move on. lol.

ive made some awesome friends over there, and thats not gonna change so ...

but since it IS my last belt test there, i figure i'm gonna go ape shit on this one and leave it all on the mat more than usual.

this muay thai is pretty exhausting, but imma push myself harder than usual, if thats possible, and see where that brings me.

the unexpectedness of Master McShanes belt tests are what makes them what they are...

and ,what that is, is 100% uncut badassery.

almost imPOSSIBLE to really pace yourself, because you never really know whats coming up next. breathing right for that entire hour is key.

and right along with me will be my kids. it all started on my first test as a white belt, and has continued for every belt test since.....

i write their names in thai in sharpie on me like im in high school or some shit.

see my hand up there? thats how it usually is, hidden from everyone, my handwraps would cover it up.... my little secret.

it kinda helps me, i dont know why.

when i turn 40, im getting that stuff right there on my back...

muay thai til i die y'all.

good luck to those taking the test tonite, and congrats to everyone who has taken it yesterday and this morning.

jaiden and sky racing.

we packed it up and headed to R.I. to visit my grandfather, Nanutz this past weekend, for a suprise fathers day visit. Jaiden and Coop were racing... sprints..laps around the house, etc.

So, Sky-Guy, like always, wanted in. He was perfectly happy to race HIMSELF.

"READY? ......SET?....GO!"... and he would start, and giggle his little ass off the whole way...

and then Jaiden joined him, and the pic i have here, while of the shittiest of quality, captured the moment perfectly (on accident). Sky, happy as can be to be running top speed with his biggest bro, and Jaiden, being Jaiden.... goofy and silly. i love this.

just another day in ohio

coop's teeth like to chill in his mouth,,, hang on... forever.

coops tooth was loose. for, like a month. and a half. he was talking funny, eating weird.... my LAWD this tooth was on my nerves. i wanted to reach in there, and just yank it out,,, when i'd be brushing his teeth,,, when he slept,,,, when he yawned....it needed to be done.
rach wouldnt let me, telling me "It's not your GRANDFATHERS era, we dont just DO that"...
and i was like... "ooooooo.........k".
finally,last week, rach made an appointment with the dentist. while he was freaking out in there yelling "DON't TAKE it OUUUUUUUUUUT ,, " .....or something like that, the entire staff in there was laughing because it was already out. and he didnt even feel it.
can't wait to see that bill.
i'm just glad he wasnt facing me when he sneezed toward the end there.... coulda lost an eye or something.

just a fork in the road. muay thai til i die.

well, i have a belt test next week, finally gonna get a new belt again,,, from brown to half brown/half black. *knock on wood*. the material this time around is TOUGH. the muay thai is long, annnnd, a burner. wicked. i havent typed a muay thai form out in a bit so heeeeeere we go....

drop level to left/pop up/left hook-right cross-left hook....drop level to
right/pop up/right cross-left hook-right cross...switch step left
roundhouse/straight right... plum clinch/right knee-switch step left knee....
turn 180 degrees while still holding clinch/ right knee- switch step left knee..
push off....right round-house... jab/cross...flying right downward "spike"
elbow.

repeat this process over and over at full power on some thai pads.

gettin alllll van damme n shit.

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE this muay thai.

i am so happy i have this stuff in my life. i am SOOOOOO less stressy. ummm, usually.

above and beyond the muay thai, we worked our sparring kick defenses. checking kicks is big when facing mofos like cookie puss who enjoy battering your legs. thighs. ribs. etc.

we also worked getting out of the way of mid kicks and head kicks. repeating the process over and over til its instinct.

or, you get kicked there.

ooops.

our krav maga this cycle was knife defences. inside, out side, overhand, shit any angle someones gonna try and shank you from.

body conditioning went arms, legs, core... this cycle. reps of exercises escalate according to belt color.

finally, theres a new school opening in Colchester. Mr Hesser is opening a sister school there, and since i live closer to there it is a great fit. add on top of that that jaiden and cooper will be in the same class , so rach will cutting her hanging in the dojo with little kids who wanna run rampant time in half, it's really great deal for us, not alot of things get EASIER as we add to our growing family, and i'd like to thank Master McShane and Mr Hesser for doingthis for us.

same material... new school. the boys and i are excited.

i'm going to miss my Norwich ABD familia, but at the same time, its going to be cool to start with that school right off the bat. i will still kick it at Norwich from time to time, for sure, especially trying to get there on some saturdays for sparring.

with it being closer to hartford, i have a feeling the schools gonna blow up quick, and fill up , so thats gonna be cool to watch happen. if anyone who reads this lives anywhere near Colchester and has any interest in muay thai/kickboxing/krav maga drop me a message and i'll answer any questions you have, or just contact Mr Hesser @ some # i dont have at this minute , i'll add it in later or someshit.

email me @ lurkwithasmirk@yahoo.com

dojo math

6 weeks off from sparring = shitty timing.

shitty timing in sparring = stupid looking shiners.

me getting caught after a six week layoff from sparring does NOT equal that ever happening again, trust.

jaiden and coop's t ball and baseball ended last weekend. this opened stuff up for me to get my spar on again on saturdays, which i was missing biiiiiiiiig time. through it all i maintained my training for the most part, so ive stayed in shape, just, i hadnt been able to spar since april. thats some shit right there.

so i walked in there today, and practiced getting punched in my face by peeps who nevvvvvvvver catch me.

timing .... that i had worked HARD to get to, poof!... gone like bobby bradys voice when he hit puberty.

my cardio was on point, i was really happy about that... my footwork was tight.

my kicks felt good.

but i dunno, everything else sucked balls mayne. i got caught...

by....

.

.

.

.

.

.

everyone.

haha, whoa.

good thing my level of "normal" is off kilter, and i actually LIKE getting hit, i mean that,, it doesnt bother me even a little bit.... physically, but dammit man, it fucks with me psychologically,,, i beat myself up for letting that shit happen. i'm better than that. no offense to anyone who popped me in the grill today, but in reality,,, i dont think i honestly lost many rounds today. i outlanded mostly every one.. but definatley got punched more today that i have in months. many months. and i needed that.

cause now im fired the fuck up. imma work my ass off now, real hard, and imma let these things fly.

and, even after kinda re-tweaking my ankle today, i have decided that i'm going back to kicking the shit outta mofos. legs, ribs and yes ,,, believe it or not heads, i'm kicking them. i started concentrating on my hands too much, im letting it all go now,.... let the wild rumpus begin.

and since everyone else has decided that we can start landing shit at 100% , i am all over that program and joining that fun little club. i am being completely honest when i say i've been sparring at around 65%, it took me MANNNNNY HOURS to get comfy there, but not no mo mang,, im ALOT more happier touching you with some steam. being one of the bigger dudes sparring is bullshit really. i'm constantly being told to notch it back, but , because im bigger, i'm repeatedly facing dudes throwing @ full power. every round, whatever....

really, i'm just suprised i didnt lose any contacts today.... haha.

after sparring, when cooper, jaiden, and myself sat down in my ride, jaiden yelled from way in back....

" DADDDDDY WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR EYE?!?!"....

lol.

*frown*

i looked in my rearview mirror, and said....

"DAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMN!"..... oh my.

the funny thing is, i ran through my head and tried to pinpoint exactly WHICH shot to my face caused it. and couldnt figure it out,, and thats some shit,,, oh well. haha,.,... man. thats a sure sign i ate too many punches.

sloppy.

so today was a free pass to my teammates.,,,,,, see ya next time.

Rhys Thomas

boy #4 was born last saturday around 1am. rachs sister julie, and friends tania and beth along with myself and our midwife. maureen, who was with us for the 3 previous birthages,.. were there. i actually got to deliver Rhys myself for the most part, and to be honest.....

it scared the piss out of me. haha.

and, it was amazing, but, grabbing wet ass things with rubber gloves is kinda nerve wracking,,,, but,,,, i didnt drop him! yay to that. hes an awesome baby, he only cries when hes hungry,,,, so hes being kind to rach, and i owe him for that. he has the impending kidney surgery, and that scares me to my core , but,,,,,

its all good.

its sad to say, but the kidney surgery crap has basically been a part of our lives since coop was born, so nothing really suprises us too much, although the level of how bad Rhys' kidney is kinda caught me off guard.

so, i will plop my faith in whatever it is i put my faith in,,,, and i will grab rachs hand and we will trudge through,, like we always do.

everything can be dealt with, and thats whats funny about life,,, you dont have a choice. theres no sand to plop my head in,,, life swirls around ... theres always good and bad... and all the bad does is make us stronger,... take that shit to the bank.

lunch ... 5/27/10

The Daffy

Duck roasted to perfection then pulled & piled high on grilled flatbread with Fontina & melted Maytag Bleu, arugula & cranberries with a squirt of Maple Mayo

from the Spicy Greenbean in Glastonbury. <<< *click n see

thoughts: i'll eat duck any way i can get it, but this was a little weird. and kinda good. kinda reall good.. i'm confused. maple mayo and bleu cheese aren't really close friends in the food world ,in retrospect, and as a matter of fact , they disagree with each other over small shit and squabble until they fist fight. they got along ok while i was eating this thing, but i dunno..... they were mean muggin' each other.... i was nervous....

Usher - Lil Freak ft. Nicki Minaj

meet the Brim

meet mike... i call him BRIM. for BRIMLEY... ^ see? that pic up there is of walter brimley, the DIABEEEEEETUS dude. it hangs on my desk. mike sits kinda diagonally in back of me, so when i spin around to talk to him, me in row 2, seat 1.... he in row 3, seat 2... when he's looking @ me and talking , hovering in the background is that pic of him. i find humor in this, you know?

i knew i wanted to share this with you guys, so i walked up to him and took a pic of him with my crappy ass cell phone..... all up in his grill. *see below* other nicknames i have for brim are

• fossil
• silver nuts
• walrus
• toast
• dumm dumm

theres others, i cant think of them right now...... i need to finish up this work, so im out.

*lol*

its the little things in life... here in hell, that pull me through.

*cooper at the dr's office (2 years ago) after getting his finger pricked--- hair all mussed up since i had to jiu jitsu his ass all over that office to hold him down,,,, seriously.*

thats my boy Cooper Ray...and yes i love this picture. i love it so much, i still have it, and glance to it to brighten my days when i am frowny. which, while i'm here at work/hell on earth, is , ummmmm,
CONSTANTLY!

these people SUCK ,MAN....

sorry. this picture and music are all i really have here at work to pull me through. and i barely even have the music, since the IT nazis shut my shit down. heres some mp3s from my desk here, an example of the stuff i put the people here through... DAILY,,,,,


12 Bad Company.mp3 .... bad company: five finger death punch

11 Snuff.mp3 .... snuff: slipknot

05 Odd One.mp3 .... odd one: sick puppies

03 The Way.mp3 .... the way: egypt central

chevelle-get some.mp3 ... yup

02 Die motherfucker Die.mp3 ... die mother fucker die : dope

three-6-mafia---it--s-a-fight.mp3 .... three 6 mafia: it's a fight

Godsmack - Keep Away.mp3 ... godsmack: keep away

all you need to do is click them to play them, and then, you can gank them.

free stuff doesnt suck.

they see me rollin'.... they hatin'.......

Oh Timmy Boy... you tubby shit.(pot calling the kettle black,, haha!) Declaring you're "back!" after beating up a dude who can't fight is just silly.

According to sherdog.com ... the "maine-iac" (ok nickname) ate 5 times a day to be as heavy as he could be againd pud. who sucks. anyways, thats a weird training system.

fatass. nice shirt. see what happens when you get knocked the fuck out by ray mercer? you go from harleys to vespas homie. UFC to Moosin, and I'm not even gonna mention how that thing your sitting on has a bigger gas tank than you. Whateverrrrrr.

meet me at ....

LOST-- what the FUCK was that even all about anyways?

ok, so rach and i watched the LOST series finale,, and all i can say is...

*huh?*

im sure rachel understood the series as a whole way better than me... since all i know for sure is that these fuckers were in a plane crash and chilled out on an island that had a smoke monster and polar bears and shit.

were they already dead?

limbo?

*blinkblink-shrug"

im pretty sure alot of what went down was spiritual, but i honestly dont get it.

i loved that show though.

i reminded me of a dream, kinda.

you know, i dont really dream, but when i do i wake up feeling like i felt when this show ended.

like " MAN! that was COOOOOOOOL. what the fuck just happened?"

i think thats what i liked about this show.

how retarded it made me feel.

rachie's gonna sure miss me saying 4-8 times a week "WHAT the hell is going ON?!?!"

great show, alot of unanswered questions, and im cool with it.

you know.... like donkey kong.

ring night tonite @ the dojo. its an "event" , where dudes who train @ ABD pair up, and have matches in jiu jitsu , muay thai, and kick boxing...ive been pumped up for this for DAYS. i get "psycho" steve hanerfeld. a true martial artist. one highly dedicated and intense mofo. steve came to my facebook page and tried to run some , i dunno, GAME on me? i dont know,,,,, i like steve. whatever it takes to motivate yourself i guess.

do your thing brah.

lol.

steves a good dude. hes big. hes strong. hes taller than me. hes younger than me. hes a blackbelt. i respect the shit out of him. hes pushed me many times during belt tests. that being said, i have only known him about a year and a half, and i seriously doubt that he knows how many fights ive been in, and how much FUN i have getting in fights. how walking into that dojo tonite is really nothing more to me than a bar fight without the booze. awww shit. ive fought in front of crowds before.

haha.

whatever, i have my game plan. imma stick to that shit. all i wanna do is show off some of the tools i picked up in that very same dojo, and then,,, im gonna get street. its ALLLLLways worked for me in the past. i'm gonna focus on muay thai, and street.

thai street.

the set up

basically... im going to try to stick to a loose schedule on this page right hurrr.

a loose erratic schedule with really no rhyme or reason,,, kinda the "anti-schedule"..

a plan, that leads me nowhere.

slow.

once a week with a cooking blog... since rach is having boom boom soon, i think i'll be cooking a little more often.

once a week there will be some sort of dojo report. i will keep that name since people already ask me for them.

i will JAM all the MMA news on this page that i find note-worthy,,,

i will get back to sharing badass cocktail recipes here, alot of people enjoyed that in the past... mainly me.

anything funny or stupid ... pow!

i like me some music, i need to see if i can pop videos here... bam!

family and fun, shit you dont know about people you never met.... find it here.

whenever i feel like it.

also, depending on how many peeps get blogs and involved, i will issue challenges and contests ... because i know having a blog can get a little ... "writers - blockey"... and alot of my favorite times in past blog lifes revolved around hi-jinx and tom-foolery.

we all need that shit in our lives, i know i do.

also, if theres any ideas or suggestions as to what you'd like to see here, tell me.

annnnnnnd , finally, i am a notorious blog-jacker, i will straight up gank your stuff if i like it.

and tuck it in here all cozy and stuff, like it was born here.

most of this posting will happen at night. wait, thats a lie.

boldfaced.

blatant boloney.

i need to re-acquaint myself with html, i actually got ok at it, then bailed, and now have NO concept....

whatsoever.

if you post pictures on the internet, and accepted me as a friend in any way shape or form on any social networking site...., i reserve the right to photoshop & poke harmless fun at you, thats the dilly yo.

i will NOT make fun of your children or use photos of them , unless i ask permission, no matter HOW funny they look, or even if they appear to have been made from wood.

i HIGHLY recommend anyone who likes to write or share shit open up a blog here.. and let me know if you did.

facebooks cool, but it also kinda sucks balls. i didnt really fit there. hold the fat jokes, please.

i might dabble in some writing as well, if you can stand the excitement.

*wake up*

one of the toughest things ive learned over the last year and a half of training is checking myself. if you know me, i mean REALLY know me, you already know im a cynical, negative, shit talking mofo who doesnt really like or trust most people. maybe its elements and circumstances that happened as a kid, beyond my control, but excuses are just that, it doesnt even matter anyways .. i am who i am. truth be told, i LIKE to be that way . i dont hold back , i dont care what you think about me, and i dont care if you like me... at ....all.
then, my fat ass hops into the dojo, and im surrounded by people .. and immediately, theres clashes of egos and personalities.
i'm loud.
i'm obnoxious.
i'm borderline tri-polar.
i suck at receiving critcism.

my kids go there, and ... i want the best for them , so of course its imperative that i ... "march to the drum."
and i understand why, and dont disagree with the importance of it....
but i work out in there, and no matter how hard i try, i continue to fall back on my first impressions, and i never forget them. ive said it before, and it will always be this way,, i DONT like you before i LIKE you..... sorry , not really.
i never insult anyone (to their face), and i look at my experience in there as a mental challenge as well as a physical one.

but, the reality is. only maybe 2 or 3 people of 50 or so even have a clue as to what im about.
i dont go in there to make friends, shit, im better at LOSING friends than making them anyways, and again....i'm cool.

but the fact is this, if i am ever disrespected in any way... i dont forget.
im grudgy as fuck, and i will quietly make you nervous around me....
and smile on the inside.

have a great day!

and then, like a bad case of crabs... i'm back.

first off, im not really expecting ... much. alot has changed since i used to blog... ummm, behind my wifes back n stuff. haha.

*huh?*

one of the MAIN things that has changed is ME, and im not getting into that. but, i left blogging (if thats what i even used to do) ,, and joined facebook... re-connected with alot of people from my past some i liked then, some i didnt, but really now, i like everybody... mostly.

*lies*

im still passionate about the same things i always have been...

• great food....
• fantastic cocktails.. (a little less often now, but i STILLLLLLL can be a crazy booze hound if needed)
• my kids (i have almost 4 now, any day... *taps fingers impatiently on desk*)
• my beautiful awesome wife rachel
• things that make me laugh
• mixed martial arts. (you'll see... *whoa*)

i guess thats what this blog is going to be about.

alllll that stuff, crushed into one badass mash-up. i need to get re-acquainted with how to rock this boat, but, when i do,,, youre probably gonna LOVE it.

*more lies*

i kinda was blogging at facebook, but, i had NO WAY of organizing shit there, so while i did some stuff i loved, i didnt try too hard, because i knew i was so busy and shit, that once it left my front page it was basically gone forever, unless you had wayy too much time on your hands and poked around blindly.

i like facebook, but its not for that.

so, you'll see.

thanks mame for stepping up and re-blogging and getting me a little fired up for this, imma do this one right.

*wink*